More Confounding Crap To Be Hung At Nats Park

The D.C. Sports Bog Twitter, ESPN Magazine and various other outlets are reporting that Natstown has something to look forward to when coming to Nationals Park for the 2011 season: more confounding crap that is being laid around the Park and being called art.

Several of my staff members and I took a crack at trying to describe the new artistic abortion that is set to be hung over the Eastern garage next year, but after several failed attempts, we’ll just leave it to the article from the Washington Business Journal:

Thomas Sayre with Raleigh, N.C.-based Clearscapes Inc. is designing 30 “stainless steel-domed forms which will accurately follow the theoretical model of the trajectory of a curving fast-ball pitch,” said Sarah Massey, spokeswoman for the D.C. Commission on the Arts and Humanities.

The steel spheres with cutout “laces,” each seven feet in diameter, will feature programmable LED lights for an “iconic ‘wow’ factor,” said Gloria Nauden, the commission’s executive director.

“It’s not just the fireworks at the stadium,” said Deirdre Ehlen, the commission’s public art coordinator. “It can be the lights too.”

Umm, what? I can’t even wrap my mind around it.

“In 20 years you’ll see how ahead of the curve the commission was in allowing that sort of piece to be developed,” she said. “It might not be a concept that the mind can wrap itself around now.”

I guess that means creator Thomas Sayre with Raleigh, N.C.-based Clearscapes Inc. is from the distant future where Skynet controls all. He already knows who will be president in 2012 and if the Mayan’s were correct. The $435,500 orbs will be meant to somehow “go with” the other Nationals Park atrocities, the mutant statues of Frank Howard, Josh Gibson and Walter Johnson which were unveiled in 2009 to the sounds of snickers and vomiting.

Actually, I just found concept art from Sayre’s website.

Eh, it is on the outside of the Park on a parking garage. I guess it couldn’t be too bad and the idea of running my car into a 100mph Stephen Strasburg fastball is tempting. Of course I would have to go through a barrier of concrete to do it.

Thanks for ruining my fun, Nats.

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