There is that age old saying: “If you do something spectacular and no one updates your Wikipedia page– do you really do it?”
Of course, I myself do not have that problem. If I take a dump out on the side of the highway it is almost immediately updated under the “personal life” section of my Wiki by some adoring reader. Sometimes I take multiple highway dumps just to see how many times I can get the thing to update. So I have to feel for guys like Mike Bacsik at times because he recently did something jaw-dropping spectacular, but no one updated his Wikipedia page.
But, if you actually care, Mikey tweeted the other night that he officially is a Fort Worth Cat now. You might remember, that team name. It was the place that once thought-awesome prospect pitcher Aaron Crow rooted after he wowed Washington with amateur posturing and douchebag agentry and not signing with the Nats after the 2008 Players Draft. A lot of people thought the Nats were doomed by not giving in to his ridiculous demands and burger eating ways, but where is that guy now? Not even a ranked prospect in the Kansas City organization? Please. That guy faded faster than Mike Bacsik’s hair.
I don’t think anyone noticed Bacsik even tweeted that which is completely sad because he thought after he gave up such a historic homerun* and got his name in the history books* he’d be hitting the sports conventions and living it up like some living historic artifact everyone wants to talk to and hear from. Like a mummy or something. But I guess all those “dirty Mexicans” took him down a peg or two all the way to Fort Worth.
So, I’m putting a work order in: if anyone has the time, please go update Mike Bacsik’s Wikipedia page. Please. I’d do it myself, but I am too busy looking at websites. Full of pictures. Wildlife pictures. Pictures of wildlife. Doing wild things and– oh, alright. I’m looking at porn.
Update: At 12:04am this morning someone updated his Wikipedia. Thank you, whoever did it. Our work here is finished.