MASN Just Put A Frat Party In My Pants

And it is a frat party that has been laced with ecstasy–

At the end of the 2011 season, when it was discovered that MASN would not be bringing back sideline reporter Debbi Taylor, the NQ grew concerned because we had no idea how MASN was going to replace such a great pair of legs and such deep questions like, “How does it feel to breath oxygen?” Well, we have the answer for you today.

MASN has brought in Kristina Akra to take over sideline duties and she will possibly debut Friday night with the help of Bob Carpenter and F.P. Santangelo. Akra brings a load of broadcasting experience as she was host of SEC Gridiron Live on Fox Sports South, sideline reporting for CoxSports and the Big East Network and hosted a webshow called Patriots Today.

She also brings boobs. Yes, boobs.

While I am sure MASN hired her for her reporting and journalistic experience, let’s be honest here: they hired her for eye candy too. They hired her so after every segment she is in men run to the bathroom afterwards.

We can have rampant debates about it and the place of women in the sports industry, but let’s cut the crap. When you hire a University of Florida alum that dresses like THIS, THIS and THIS, you know part of the reason why you are doing it.

I don’t say this to knockers– er, knock her. I am sure she is a professional, I am sure she is experienced and I am sure she will do her best. But let’s face it: if you are still even half a vibrant American male (or lady if that is your thing), Akra could have a voice and personality like someone trying to shove a dry corn cob up your ass and you would still happily watch her. I know I would.

Again that is not necessarily a bad thing. I am just being honest. I sort of have to be.

Because how else am I going to explain the tent pole in my pants the first time the NQ and Ms. Akra meet? Talk about embarrassing…

One thought on “MASN Just Put A Frat Party In My Pants

  1. Pingback: DMV: Kristina Akra Is MASN’s New Debbi Taylor Upgrade | Mr. Irrelevant, a D.C. Sports Blog by the Brothers Mottram

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